Treat a Guy Right

How to treat a nice guy

I was recently told that when a woman has been dogged out all her life by men, when she gets a good man, she don’t know how to act. This has many implications she don’t know how to treat him, she messes up, she just can’t figure out what he wants. Well let me explain this one so it is clear (I hope). When some one is treated bad in their relationships they build up walls defenses that they use to protect them selves. One of the things the new relationship has to do is be patient and let the woman bring down the defenses. After that the woman can start to be guided and then freed from the past. yes she will still have some times when she is haunted by the experiences but that is where more patients is needed.
As for how to treat him Everyone has heard of the golden rule right? treat others the way you want to be treated. It applies here too. If you want to be treated like a Queen then treat your man like a King. I’m not saying everything will be perfect, but I am saying that when women treat men with respect, love, admiration. the man will have what he wants. Now for the she messes up- Relationships take work on both parts. When hard times come, be honest and straight up. show respect to each other and don’t play games. Playing games only leads to being alone.
Building a relationship takes all our lives. it is not just a few years and then you can sit back and enjoy the ride. There are ups and downs every one must face. This is when you truly know you love one another if you can weather the storms of life. The blessings you will reap after the storms are worth enduring them. But you must be mindful of the dangers. Don’t be naive and put your self in situations where you will end up hurting each other. Think and be mindful of the way things are heading. Many times people put them selves in situations that they don’t mean to be in but because they become complacent and think they are untouchable they traverse the dangers and more often then not they get bit. Many times to the destruction of the relationship they wish to hold on to. But if you endure and show grace, compassion, mercy basically Love you will have a stronger relationship then ever before. I hope all of you are able to endure the hard times as well as be overjoyed with the good times of your relationships.

How To Treat a Nice Guy

How to Treat a Nice Guy Right

Know a woman who always seems to be in perfect sync with the guys she dates--they laugh at each other's jokes, are considerate of one another's feelings, and are lovers and best friends to boot? Well, the reason this gal's so lucky in love is pretty simple: It's because she treats her guy right, and he can't get enough of her company. Now, when I say she "treats her guy right," what do I mean? She treats him like a friend, giving him the same five-star support, understanding, and (yes) slack we automatically extend to our girlfriends. If you want to reap the same benefits in your own love life, try some of these tips, and, trust me, you'll notice a difference.

Share an activity
For women, it's second nature to invite their girlfriends along for a shopping spree, yoga class, spa day, you name it. But activity-based bonding shouldn't be relegated to females only. Guys love jawing over a joint pursuit, and while he might not be up for a mani/pedi (nor you for a day watching basketball), there are plenty of other options. Becoming gym buddies is a no-brainer (and can be that extra kick-in-the-butt you need to go more often), or if you two usually dine out on a Saturday night, consider delving into a cookbook and taking a crack at a recipe that's a bit of a challenge, like duck terrine with wine-glazed shallots. Whether it turns out terrific or so odd you end up resorting to takeout, the fact that you've worked toward a common goal together builds team spirit. And, by investing in a history of shared experiences with your partner in crime, you'll increase the things you have in common and experience a deeper bond

Cheer him on
Women take great pains to make their girlfriends feel great about themselves, showering them with ego-boosters from "You look amazing; that is the best color on you" to "Of course, you should e-mail that guy--he'd be lucky to have you!" And while we might think the world of the men we date and even brag about them to friends and family members, telling him so doesn't often occur to us. Maybe it's because we assume guys possess impenetrable egos--but the truth is, they can be just as insecure as your female friends and would probably appreciate a compliment now and then. So, if he just got a promotion at work, toast him at dinner and tell him exactly why he deserved it. Or, try a simple "You look so good in that shirt--it really brings out the color in your eyes." Don't be surprised if he suddenly seems to be around a whole lot more often, basking in your presence! 

Let him be himself
Most women find it hard to love guys just the way they are. We want to change their hair, their clothes, their job, and sometimes even their friends to fit our ideal. With our own pals, we're more accepting of differences, actually proud to have a tech nerd, yoga snob or fashion slave as part of our collection of confidantes. Ruthanna Hall, a sales associate in New York, has learned to relax and appreciate distinctly male behaviors with great results for her relationship. "When we go out, I might feel more like drinking a cool cocktail uptown, but then all he'll want is a beer at the neighborhood bar," she explains. Rather than sulk all evening about his lack of class, she'll focus in on the funny conversation they're having. "Sure, most guys do things that cause girls to go 'uggghhh!' But that's just the way they are," she says. 'Why not get on with it and have fun?" 

Tell him what you think
We don't expect our best buds to always know what we're thinking. In fact, we actually enjoy swapping thoughts, hopes, and fears--that's most of the fun! But why, then, are we so disappointed when our boyfriends don't exhibit ESP 24/7? We've all been guilty of harboring romantic notions like "If he's been listening to me, he'll know exactly where to take me for dinner on Valentine's Day" or "If he were truly paying attention right now, he'd know I'm freaking out about this virus on my computer and offer to come over and help." But trust me, you'll save yourself a lot of disappointment by just telling him where you want to dine out on Valentine's Day, or by asking him to come over with his anti-virus software. After all, it's common knowledge that two heads are better than one, so just because you've decided he's the one, don't go mum and add major guesswork to your communications.

Give him his space
Sometimes, girlfriends just go MIA for a while. They get so busy at work that they don't return your e-mail. Do we give them flack for it? Nothing serious. But for some reason, the rules change for guys: We rail on them for not promptly returning phone calls, take offense if they want a guy's night out. But remember, achieving a balance between "me" time and "we" time will make the time you do spend together even better. Bridget Cunningham found her relationship got so much mellower once she stopped stressing about where her boyfriend was every hour. "I don't hold it against him when he wants to have his own time," she says. "You don't cut your friends off when they do things with other people, so why shouldn't it be the same with the person you love? Meanwhile I'm free to go running off with my girlfriend and blab about girl stuff. We meet afterwards for coffee, and we're both feeling refreshed and fulfilled by spending time apart...and that much happier to be spending time together again.

Ways to Make Your Relationship Magically Romantic

10 Ways to Make Your Relationship Magically Romantic

Creating magical moments in your relationship is something everyone thinks about, but few people do. Perhaps it's because they actually can't think of exactly what to do. Here are ten "acts of love" that you can do with and for your partner to bring a little more romance into your relationship.

1. Make your morning time special by bringing your partner a cup of coffee while he or she is still in bed. If you're willing and able you can also serve them breakfast in bed. It will make your partner feel cherished and the kindness will be returned.

2. Make the time at the end of the work-day when you first see one another extra special by giving each other a 10 second hug and kiss. You will both feel more deeply connected throughout the evening. Also remember to touch your partner affectionately throughout the day, not just when you want to be romantic

3. Make time to make-time. Plan a romantic rendezvous during the week. You can get a room at a local hotel or plan to have the house all to yourselves. Just the anticipation of being together in this way will add spark to your romantic life.

4. Whenever you can, take the time to give your partner 100% of your attention when they want to talk to you. Put down the remote control or whatever you're reading, face your partner and say "What would you like to talk about?" It will make your partner feel loved and important to you.

5. Take the time to tell your partner that they look wonderful, beautiful, sexy or great. We all have doubts about our looks and hearing that we are attractive to our partners is a very important part of creating a romantic relationship.

6. Before you leave in the morning tell your partner that you are looking forward to seeing them when you return. Never leave the house without acknowledging your partner or saying, "I love you."

7. Next time you are shopping alone, get a couple of little "surprise gifts" for your partner. The next time he or she is feeling down, give them one of the gifts. This is a wonderful and uplifting act of love and it will be remembered for a very long time.

8. If your partner is having a rough day offer to take them out or make dinner for them. If they are the one usually doing the cooking this will be a welcome change and a sign of your appreciation. If they are experiencing stress at work, it will be a great way for them to unwind from a tough day.

9. Be spontaneous and rent a convertible and kidnap your partner for a drive up the coast for lunch or dinner. This is a wonderfully romantic and very simple thing to do. If you want to be a little more extravagant, you can choose to spend the night at a Bed & Breakfast and drive home the next day.

10. This one is terribly romantic, so don't try it unless you're ready for a passionate evening. Get your partner two or more roses. Take one of them and pull off the petals. Drop the petals on the floor leading to the bedroom and place several petals on the bed. Put the other roses in a vase on the nightstand. Your partner will never forget your thoughtfulness.

Don't try to do everything on this list in the same weekend, one a month is plenty. These ideas are just a little help to get you started. Once you get going, more ideas will come to you on their own.

Taking the time to create romance in your relationship is paramount to creating a fulfilling love life. Even if you think your ideas are silly, your partner will be thrilled that you took the time to do something loving for them. Remember, it's the thought that counts.

Solutions That Can Save a Relationship

7 Solutions That Can Save a Relationship

It's the rare couple that doesn't run into a few bumps in the road. If you recognize ahead of time, though, what those relationship problems might be, you'll have a much better chance of getting past them.

Marriage and family therapist Mitch Temple, author of The Marriage Turnaround,says that in spite of the fact that every relationship has its ups and downs, successful couples have learned how to manage them and keep their love life going. They gain success in marriage by hanging in there, tackling problems, and learning how to maneuver through the complex issues of everyday life. Many do this by reading self-help books and articles, attending seminars, going to counseling, observing other successful couples, or simply using trial and error.

1.  First, you must decide whether the relationship is worth saving.  While almost every relationship can be saved with hard work, both parties must decide that they want to make it work.  Because if a partner has opted out and doesn’t want to opt back in, there is little that can be done.

Many people stay in a relationship because it is convenient or remain in a marriage because of the children.  But that is not enough.  How to save a relationship starts with a commitment by both parties that the relationship is worth saving

2.  If you can't "communicate" without raising your voices, go to a public spot like the library, park, or restaurant where you'd be embarrassed if anyone saw you screaming

3.  Use body language to show you are listening. Don’t doodle, look at your watch, or pick at your nails. Nod so the other person knows you're getting the message, and rephrase if you need to. For instance, say, "What I hear you saying is that you feel as though you have more chores at home, even though we're both working." If you're right, the other can confirm. If what the other person really meant was, hey, you're a slob and you create more work for me by having to pick up after you, he or she can say so, but in a nicer way.

4.  Plan, plan, plan. Fay suggests making an appointment,  but not necessarily at night when everyone is tired. Maybe during the baby's Saturday afternoon nap or a "before-work quickie." Ask friends or family to take the kids every other Friday night for a sleepover. "When sex is on the calendar, it increases your anticipation," Fay says, adding that mixing things up a bit can increase your sexual enjoyment as well. Why not have sex in the kitchen? Sex by the fire? Sex standing up in the hallway?

5.  Next, you must pinpoint the problem or problems in a relationship.  One of the biggest problems in how to save a relationship is that people believe the symptoms of the problem are the problem itself.

For instance, many people think an affair is a problem that causes break ups.  In truth, the affair is a symptom of a deeper problem.  For instance, a lack of true intimacy can lead to a straying spouse.  While most people look at the affair as the problem, the underlying cause of the affair was the lack of intimacy in the primary relationship.  If you do not deal with the lack of intimacy, you might be able to keep another affair from starting through the use of guilt, but another problem (for instance pornography) could pop up because you haven’t dealt with  the core issue.

When you start to deal with core issues rather than symptoms, you can save the relationship.  

6.  you should realize that saving a relationship is an ongoing process.  You are going to take two steps forward only to take one step back.  There is going to be both laughter and tears going forward.  Be quick to apologize and slow to blame.

Magic of Making Up is a manual that contains easy to apply step by step guide authored by T Dub, a Relationship Expert, who has helped over 6,000 people from around the world to get their ex back, including me, through the guides provided in this manual which worked like magic in getting my ex back. I must tell you that it worked for me, till today me and my ex are more in love than before .

7.  If your sexual relationship problems can't be resolved on your own, Fay recommends consulting a qualified sex therapist to help you both address and resolve your issues

Sexual intercourse - painful

Sexual intercourse - painful

For both men and women, pain can occur in the pelvic area during or soon after sexual intercourse. It can happen at any time during sex -- for example, at the time of penetration, erection, or ejaculation -- or after sexual activity.

Eventually, ongoing pain may cause a person to lose interest in any sexual activity.

The medical term for this is dyspareunia

Causes

• A diaphragm that does not fit properly
• Genital irritation from soaps, detergents, douches, or feminine hygiene products
• Hemorrhoids
• Herpes sores, genital warts, or other sexually transmitted infections (STIs)
• Intercourse too soon after surgery or childbirth
• Menopause
• Ovarian cysts
• Prostatitis -- inflammation of the prostate
• Reaction to the latex of a diaphragm or condom
• Sexual abuse or rape
• Urinary tract infections
• Use of certain medications
• Vaginal dryness or too little lubrication (for example, from not enough foreplay)
• Vaginal infection

Home Care

For painful intercourse in women after pregnancy:

• Wait at least 6 weeks after childbirth before resuming sexual relations.
• Be gentle and patient.
• Use lubrication as needed.

For vaginal dryness/inadequate lubrication:

• Try water-based lubricants.
• If you are going through menopause and lubricants don't work, talk to your doctor about estrogen creams or other prescription medications.

For painful intercourse caused by prostatitis:

• Soak in a warm bath.
• Drink plenty of fluids, but avoid alcohol and caffeine.
• Take acetaminophen or ibuprofen.
• Take antibiotics as prescribed.

For hemorrhoids, try stool softeners. Antibiotics may be required for urinary tract infections, sexually transmitted infections, or vaginal infections.

Other causes of painful intercourse may require prescription medications or, rarely, surgery.

Sex therapy may be helpful, especially if no underlying medical cause is identified. Guilt, inner conflict, or unresolved feelings about past abuse may be involved which need to be worked through in therapy. It may be best for your partner to see the therapist with you.

When to Contact a Medical Professional

Call your doctor if:

• Home remedies are not working.
• You have other symptoms with painful intercourse, like bleeding, genital lesions, irregular periods, discharge from penis or vagina, or involuntary vaginal muscle contraction.

If you have been sexually assaulted, report the crime to the police and go to the emergency room immediately. Get a trusted friend to accompany you. Do NOT change, bathe, shower or even wash your hands before the ER evaluation. The temptation to do so will be great, but it is important to not lose any evidence in order to help find, charge, and convict the suspect.

What to Expect at Your Office Visit

Your doctor will take your medical history and perform a physical examination.

Medical history questions may include:

• When did the pain begin or has intercourse always been painful?
• Is intercourse painful every time that it is attempted?
• Is it painful for your partner as well?
• At what point during (or after) intercourse does the pain begin? Upon entry/penetration? During ejaculation?
• Where, specifically, is the pain?
• Does anything make the pain better?
• Do you have any other symptoms?
• What are your attitudes towards sex in general?
• Have you had a significant traumatic event in the past (rape, child abuse, or similar)?
• What medications do you take?
• What illnesses, diseases, and disorders are you being treated for?

• Have you had a significant emotional event recently?
• Have you ever had pain-free sex with this partner? With any partner?

It may be best to see the doctor together with your partner. Physical examination may include a pelvic examination (for women), a prostate examination (for men), and a rectal examination. If a physical problem is suspected, appropriate tests will be ordered.

Antibiotics, painkillers, or hormones are amongst the treatment options that may be considered.

Prevention

• Good hygiene and routine medical care will help to some degree.
• Adequate foreplay and stimulation will help to ensure proper lubrication of the vagina.
• The use of a water-soluble lubricant like K-Y Jelly may also help. Vaseline should not be used as a sexual lubricant because it is not compatible with latex condoms (it causes them to break), it is not water soluble, and it may encourage vaginal infections.
• Practicing safe sex can help prevent sexually transmitted infections.

Alternative Names

Painful sexual intercourse; Dyspareunia